Get Old. Get Happy. Creating Intimacy by Hangin' in There!

News flash!  The older you are the happier you are–or so says a new study. I’m not surprised.

Shela and Dale.

I’ve reached the big six-oh and I’m happier than I’ve ever been. I no longer care–as I did in my youth–about wearing shoes that look fabulous when you’re sitting down but in which you cannot walk more than 2 steps without wincing in agony. I dress around my bunions and I do not care if my shoes are slightly less–okay a lot less–fashionable than strappy little 5″ stilettos. I’m a grandparent and happy about it. I feel sorry for other grandparents who think their grandkids are the cutest kids ever born. Mine really are and I unabashedly proclaim that to the entire world. But here’s the really cool thing. I may be creeping up on old age faster than I’d like, but I’m doin’ it with my best friend, my sweetheart, my lover, my hang out buddy. He’s the guy who makes me laugh, who gets my jokes, who sighs with sympathy when my lower back aches, who doesn’t care that I don’t wear stilettos, and with whom I can while away hours on end with memories of great times we’ve had and plan even more of the same. He’s the guy who, while we sit on the sofa watching TV, reaches over to hold my hand and with that quiet small-but-intimate gesture says, “I love you.”  He’s the guy who, with just a smile, can make my heart sing. In your early days, intimacy comes with fireworks.  There’s only one thing as good as that: the kind of contented intimacy that comes with time and experience.

When you’re at your wit’s end, or your sweetheart has done something so clueless you wonder if he or she has suffered a head injury, or you find yourself remembering your single days with fondness, hang in there. Your reward will be the happiness and contentment that comes with having grown old together. It’s pretty darned special.