The enemy of a great relationship is complacency. It begins so innocently. You forget how attractive, funny or caring your honey is because you’re together all the time. You get wrapped up in your “stuff” and forget to do the little, day-to-day things that make your sweetheart aware of your love. You forget how good life feels because you picked someone amazing and the lottery win of being picked back. Before you know… Read the rest

I recently met a friend for coffee. She shared that she’d been mad at her husband for a year.  A year???  Wow. It made me sad to think someone could be angry for so long and it also made me think about kissing and making up. All couples have arguments. Hubby Dale and I are no exception. We get irritated with each other but it doesn’t last long. We enjoy each… Read the rest

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Eat your broccoli. It’s good for you.

Take your cod liver oil. It’s good for you.

Exercise daily. It’s good for you.

Have sex. It’s good for you.

Huh? Broccoli, cod liver oil, exercise and sex are all in the same do-it-cuz-it’s-good-for-you category. Don’t you think that argument (and we’ve heard a lot of it lately) makes having sex sound like something you do while holding your nose? Something you… Read the rest

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There are plenty of so-called truisms out there, all designed to make us “okay” with things that aren’t “okay.” For example, “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me.”  We all know that’s baloney. Words can hurt like hell.

And how about this one: “What you don’t know can’t hurt you.” This truism has been readily debunked by the medical profession. Simply put, if you don’t know your tapioca… Read the rest

It was in grade school math that I first learned about reducing fractions to their lowest common denominator. I hated math. Still do. But, I’ve learned that “reducing to the lowest common denominator” is a great term for describing how, in human interaction, we “sink” to the most basic, least sophisticated level of those with whom we are engaging. If you’ve ever argued with a child, you know what I mean. Before you realize… Read the rest

One of the coolest things about being in a committed relationship is having someone to grow old with, someone with whom you share so many memories that sitting in the rockers on the porch won’t be boring at all, you’ll have so much to talk about.  Equally as cool is how, if you open your mind and heart, your sweetheart can teach you things you might not otherwise ever learn, and can even help… Read the rest

Remember when you and your sweetheart first met? You counted the minutes until you saw him again. You called just to hear her sweet voice. The air was alive with the snap, crackle & pop of sexual energy. You couldn’t get enough of each other and you were always on your best behavior. It was easy to be playful.

Then, you settled into a routine and began to share everyday life. Being on best… Read the rest

Scorekeeping. You’ve been told it’s death to your relationship but I’m going to give you three reasons why, when done right, it’s good for your relationship.

1. It’s a human nature “lemon” so you might as well make lemonade. Mother Teresa and Gandhi aside, we all keep score. It’s human nature to notice if your sweetheart has AGAIN “forgotten” to call, left dirty dishes in the sink, embarrassed you, hurt your feelings, broken a… Read the rest

Do an Amazon search on “self-improvement” or “self-help” and you’ll get a long, long list of books to choose from. There are books on how to have better communication, better sex, more intimacy, fair fights, more fun, less conflict, a more fulfilling life, more self-confidence, more self-esteem, and so on and so on.

What you won’t find is a book based on the premise that you’re perfect but your sweetheart needs a complete overhaul… Read the rest

Forgiveness. It’s a topic we hear a lot about when it comes to marriage and relationships. Lord knows there’s plenty to forgive and I, for one, am grateful for a partner who has a generous and forgiving heart. But I ask you, for all the talk and hoopla about the “virtue” of forgiveness, why isn’t there more said about the conditions under which one is forgiven? You, in return, might ask, “Isn’t forgiveness supposed… Read the rest